I used to have so many art ideas. I would constantly be drawing. Anytime I had time to just think, I was thinking about what I could draw next. I couldn't wait to get a pencil and paper in my possession so I could draw. Things just flowed out of my mind onto paper, or the computer.

But now.....

I don't know if its art block or what. I don't think it is, because before when I had art block I'd sit with pencil/tablet pen in hand and just stare at the computer. Now....I feel as if drawing is a chore. I'm like "Oh great, I have to draw this picture and make it look good." I miss just being able to draw. Right now I'm so concerned about my style, and how my backgrounds that I just....took all the fun out of drawing. Why am I so concerned about having my own style? Does it really matter? And I actually going to take art school and try to have a career in the arts? Right now I don't know. I'm mad that I can't just sit down and doodle something that I thought was funny today, without having to analyze everything in it and go "hmm....is this actually good?". I hate it. I wish I could just sit down and draw. I wish I never started drawing anime in the first place, because then I wouldn't have this issue with styles, because it would already be my style not "anime". It really kind of ticks me off. But now because I've been seriously drawing for....seven years? Its hard to just all of a sudden change how I've been drawing. I envy sooooo many people because they can just...draw. Yes, they analyze their finished work, but I'm sure they don't do what I do.
"Does this look too much like anime? Is my shading realistic? Is combining realism and anime really my own style? How many other people combine these two things? Probably a lot. Maybe if I change the eyes to how this artist draws them, it might looks better. Hmm...no, now it just looks like I'm trying to copy their style. Maybe if I fix the nose. No, now it looks like this other artist."

This goes through my head with every single piece of art I submit. Every single piece. Maybe I'm just overtired and I'm thinking too hard. All I want, is to just sit down and draw, have fun drawing, look at my finished artwork and go "This has my name written all over it" and for people to see my art somewhere and go "Oh hey, you can totally tell that Shelby drew this".

Now that everyone has settled down from holidays, and are going back to school, I'm assuming now is a good time to hold a contest? I also feel its a good time, because I've put out some good pieces of art lately, so maybe that will motivate people to want to get a prize xD

So I'm going to start the contest now, I think. As of right now, the contest will end February.....22? Sure. I might extend it.

Contest is: Draw my Oc!
Absolutely anyone can enter! You may draw any of my Oc's that appear in my Oc section in my gallery.

Judging will be done mostly by me. I will judge on two factors, one being quality of art. I don't mean you need to be an amazing artist, but I mean it needs to be obvious that you put some effort into it. And two, I will judge you on your ability to show my character's personality in your artwork. I know that I don't have all my character bios, but if you pick a character that doesn't have a bio, just note me and I'll give you their life story, as well as their height, weight, eyecolor etc.

First Place will receive two fully digital pictures from me (ie. character with background)
Second Place will receive one fully digital picture from me
Third Place will receive one digital pinup from me (ie. just a character, no background)

So yeah! Thats it, I think! Goodluck to you all, and I hope many of you enter!

TO THE GROOOWWWNNNNDDDD

Sorry I just felt like saying that all of a sudden



Happy new years everyone!! Isn't it weird that its 2010?? And I also refuse to say twenty ten, I will always say two thousand ____. Thats how it goes.


So.


I'm using a lot of space in this journal.






Look at this space!!









As you can tell I'm extremely bored.




And cranky.

Here's to the last journal of the year!

Hope you all had a excellent year, and that you have an even better next one~

Its time to put all sorrows of this year behind you and continue on....God bless you all, and have a great, safe new year!

As the title says, my darling cat died sometime between this morning and yesterday afternoon. I went out to the barn to check on his food supply and found him seemingly asleep in his heated bed but.....

I haven't been able to stop thinking about him all day, and of course, several times I've burst into hysterical tears. So I'm a bit sensitive right now...I apologise if I don't put out any art for a week while I recover, if the Secret Santa deadline comes and goes, I'll send a note to my giftee and explain to her that I'll get her gift to her as soon as I recover....-major sighs-

I love my Greycat so much......but now he's joined Blackcat and Mittens in kitty heaven, and they are all having a great party now.....Oh dear, I'm tearing up again, off to watch Star Wars so I can forget.....